Holy @#$%! Half of Parents Ok with Their Kids Swearing

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Not long ago, cursing among kids elicited an almost universal clutching of pearls. It was seen as a major sign of disrespect and lack of education, a pathway to more problematic behavior. Up through the 1970s, it was common for parents in the United States and the United Kingdom to threaten to wash their children’s mouths out with soap if they caught them using foul language.

But attitudes toward profanity shifted and that kind of threat came to be seen as abusive.

Today, less than half of parents say children should never swear, according to one recent national poll from the University of Michigan. The researchers tallied responses to a survey taken last August by 1,678 parents with one child aged 6 to 17. More than a third said whether swearing was acceptable depended on circumstances. Smaller percentages said it depends on the word or that swearing in general isn’t a big deal. About a quarter of parents admitted that their children use curse words at least occasionally, a number that jumped to 40 percent for teens.

“Parents are navigating a gray area when it comes to language,” explained Sarah Clark, who co-directed the poll, in a statement. “Many don’t love hearing these words, but they also recognize that context, age, and intent matter.”

Read more: “The Strange Persistence of First Languages”

Children seem to learn most of the profanity they use from friends or classmates rather than parents, according to two-thirds of the parents surveyed. They also learn adult language from popular media, and by listening to adults at home. About a third of parents said social pressure is to blame—that is, their kids swear to fit in. At least, this was the perception for teenagers. For younger kids, parents proposed that their motivation was more linked to attention-seeking or attempts at humor.

“Swearing can be a form of social currency for kids,” Clark said. “For some, it’s about belonging. For others, it’s about getting a reaction. Understanding the ‘why’ can help parents respond more effectively.”

Clark added that for some kids, swearing could actually be a sign that they need help managing negative emotions. For those parents who do object, worrying that the language is rude or disrespectful was closely linked with feeling that context matters. According to the survey, some parents will say it’s ok when kids swear with their friends, but less so when it happens at school or in public.

Parents of teens are more likely to ignore swearing than parents of younger children. “It can be challenging for parents to maintain a consistent approach to swearing,” Clark said. “Parents should sort through their own attitudes to determine which words and situations will merit a response. Young children may not realize certain terms are inappropriate, so parents may need to explain meaning, context, or social impact to build understanding and empathy.”

To cut down on swearing, parents say they look in the mirror first. More than half watch their own language at home. But they also limit their kids’ exposure to certain music, movies, or videos and ask others not to swear around their kids. About 20 percent of parents say they go so far as to discourage friendships with kids who curse a lot.

Having a consistent and calm response is more likely to get your kids attention than harsh punishment, the researchers suggest. 

And you probably shouldn’t swear at them.

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Lead image: Anastasiia Hevko / Shutterstock

• Kristen French

  Posted on January 23, 2026

  Kristen French is an associate editor at Nautilus. She has worked in science journalism since 2013, reporting and writing features and news for publications such as Wired, Backchannel, The Verge, and New York Magazine. She has a masters degree in science journalism from Columbia University.